Every day is a struggle. A battle of wills. I want to eat what I want when I want. I want to skip the gym. And even when I go to the gym, I struggle to make it through 30 minutes and find myself desperate to get off the dang machine...
I feel good after hitting the elliptical or treadmill. I feel accomplished. I like seeing just how many calories I've burned off. But it is a struggle, day in and day out to just do it.
Right now I'm focusing on getting at least 30 minutes 5 days a week. For right now, that is a huge goal! Eventually I want to be at 60 minutes 6 days a week. But right now the thought of that literally brings me to tears. I don't know why, but I'm working on that too.
I really, really, really want to do the Disney Princess Half in 2012. That is a huge goal also! It will take dedication, training, and losing a lot of this weight to be successful.
But when I focus on that, I again want to cry. It seems impossible. I feel alone, and I often feel like a failure because I am struggling so much. I'm working on making better food choices every day, every meal. I'm working on making exercise a priority, and even more than that, a lifestyle.
But dang this is hard. I know that I can do it, but I don't know if I WILL do it. If that makes sense. Am I capable? Yes. Do I have the tools? Yes. Do I have the willpower and determination? Yes. Will I put that willpower and determination to use? I just don't know. One day at a time...
January 1, 2019: 187 Pounds... and a Plan
6 years ago
Amy,
ReplyDeleteDon't think of 2012 today or even next month. Just get through today. We only have today. Get your 30 minutes in today and tomorrow will take care of tomorrow. I know it sounds like crap but it works. If it worked for me it can work for you. It is one day at a time. We can do ANYTHING for one day. Remember: Just for today!
Jane~
Keepingthepoundsoff.com