This weekend was a rough one for me emotionally. I've been dealing with some issues and it's just been very tough. I tend to be an emotional eater when I feel trapped, misunderstood, and/or out of control of the situation. This weekend was no exception.
I made some very poor choices in the midst of my good ones and today I'm feeling very guilty. I think the guilt is because tomorrow is weigh day and I don't want to disappoint Nancy or myself. I am still trying to figure out how to change my thinking toward food when I'm in the middle of an emotional "crisis" and all I want to do is eat.
It really bothers me that I can't just do it already. It seems simple enough... follow the food plan Nancy and I created for the week, exercise 5 days minimum, weigh in and see results... I can't seem to just do it though. I know the issues are deeper than that, and that if it really were that simple no one would be obese... and yet, I expect myself to do it because I know how to do it.
I want to be more positive and cut myself slack, but then I worry that if I am too lenient I'll just let myself do anything, but I don't want to be too hard on myself, and so they cycle continues.
I need this. I need God to open my eyes and heart to the true "why" and to help me walk in freedom from this addiction to food. I obviously can't do it on my own, and it's really hard to let it go.
2 days ago